When the Universe Calls You Out

I returned from traveling to the Wisconsin Dells, yet again. I had been taking this trip weekly since January (2016). My health had been deteriorating for years and I was coming upon a state of desperation that was akin to feeling like the air was leaving the room I was in and I was unable to locate a window or door that would give me reprieve, allow me to find a way out. This had been going on for too long. At times I would lose hope, then rebound bringing forward a resilience to continue the search for healing. I longed to get my life back. I had lost so much. Not just my physical abilities, but my mental capacity and ability to remain optimistic. Darkness would overtake me in ways that I was unsure I would make it out of.

Two days of treatments had left me exhausted. It usually did. I knew I would bounce back and within a few days would feel better so having committed to attend a concert that weekend was not concerning.

We joined our friends at a small music venue to see one of our newly discovered and quickly adopted favorite bands, Lucius. It was a brisk night as we walked to the show, the warmth from the building welcoming you as you entered the building. It wasn’t terribly crowded when we arrived which gave us the opportunity to find a spot midway through the crowd, a little toward stage right. We had a great view as the band stepped into the spotlight. The anticipation led to waves of cheers and excitement when the first notes were played. We listened, sang the songs that we had rehearsed and learned the words to and enjoyed the company of the group we were with.

At some point during the evening I felt a quick moment of doubt come over me. Would this be all that I would be for the rest of my life? Would I ever make it to the other side? As quickly as the thoughts came they drifted away. I worked to shake off the remnants when the band hit the notes of a song that beckoned my interest. “Dusty Trails.” The kind of song where I could name that tune in three notes. 

The mere recollection of this song in my mind brings chills. So poignant, raw and honest. In the moment the lyrics came over the crowd and hit me tears stung the corner of my eyes. And then, I had the moment.

Watching the women harmonize on the stage and move through the chorus my eyes fixed on them. I took in every word like the air I was breathing. Then, their eyes fixed on me. I glanced left, then right, oh my god, they are both looking right at me! The words that left them floated over the crowd and landed in me, like a knife that cut straight to my soul, beckoning me to a choice.

Holy shit. I scanned the audience to see whom they might be addressing. It certainly couldn’t be me. I glanced back to the stage and their eyes were still fixed on me, setting sights straight on my soul. They were singing to me. How could they have known?

The song lays out a choice. The description of the dusty trail, the challenges of life that ultimately can lead to a golden road. However, as we navigate through life we can become distraught and frustrated turning away from the journey. We recoil and again hide in the walls that we have surrounded ourselves with, not knowing that we are almost to the gold. Perhaps quitting when we are just three feet away. Our other option is to continue on, to remain steadfast in our courage knowing that we are almost there.

Could they sense the despair, see that I was on the verge of giving up on all that I had been doing to heal my body? Could they read my mind and know what I had been thinking? The music answering the questions that had been stirring in my mind. Was it worth it, all that I was doing, would it lead to the life I was longing for?

What I know and believe is that the moment they began that song and those lyrics started flowing they were looking for me. In a way that only the universe can do, I received a message of hope. A call to greatness. In that moment I had a choice to make. They didn’t mandate it to me, there was no document of commitment laid in front of me. It was simply a choice to be made. Would I return to where I started, or would I embark on the journey that was only halfway complete? Would I see it through?

This choice is one that faces us all. The journey through this life is not for the faint of heart. Those who chose to return, I applaud their choice. That too, takes commitment. Those of us, however, who choose to continue forward, to embrace the unknown in a journey to find that golden road, we are the truth seekers, the love avengers and spirited women who go for it without apology. It is time, love, your time. So here I stand before you, locked in view, eyes holding one another. I see you and set before you the same call. 

The choice, love, is yours. Which do you choose?

P.S. Click this link to listen to my favorite rendition of the song Dusty Trails by Lucious.

Finding the Edge of Your Comfort Zone: Embrace the Unknown and Quantum Leap Your Potential

I always find the conversation around the “comfort zone” incredibly interesting. And I think for most it feels like a worn-out topic. Yes, I know…all the magic happens outside the comfort zone. Well, what happens when you have no idea that you are even in your comfort zone? How the hell do you then know that you need to move out of it?

I haven’t always been in tune with this. And, honestly, most of the time when I am “stepping out of my comfort zone” I have no idea that I am doing it. I find it makes this step that much easier.

Take running for instance. Yes, it’s uncomfortable to start. I knew that when I began running after having my 4th child. But I hit the pavement anyway because the discomfort of the additional weight far outweighed the comfort of the sedentary life. When I purchased my business…it a was helluva uncomfortable zone. I had no idea what I was doing or what I was getting into. I fought hard against the opportunity. I was so far out of my comfort zone that it felt like I was fighting against the very opportunity I was seizing for myself. Yet, when it came time to hire an Operations Manager I didn’t hesitate. The uncomfortable position I was in as a new business owner made stepping outside the comfort zone of entrepreneurial control much, much easier. 

In both cases, my life changed for the better. I not only lost the weight but found the athlete within me and became a marathon runner. And I discovered my LOVE for running. Likewise, the business flourished after I let go of the reins and allowed others to shine in their own expertise and skill set. Both situations were a win-win.

I don’t have to tell you how important it is to step outside of your comfort zone. As successful women and high achievers, we already know this and feel as though we do it as second nature. BUT what if you are blindly caught in the comfort of a situation that you have yet to realize is keeping you stuck in a place that you were only supposed to be passing through? This is the magic…the key to making the shifts, the bold moves that have percolated in your mind.

Finding the edge of the Comfort Zone

Let’s talk about the comfort zone and what it signifies. It is a psychological state in which one feels at ease because they are not being tested. People will only participate in activities that are familiar, making them feel “in control” of their environment. Such words could not better identify the desire of a high achiever. The desire to be “in control” thereby continuously challenging themselves out of the discomfort and back into the familiar known. Yes, yes, I know I completely flipped on you there. And for good reason. While we may take calculated risks and feel as though we are stretching ourselves there is an inner dialogue that rolls under the tow of consciousness continuously sucking us back to the status quo. This, my friends, is the edge of the comfort zone that we must find.

Fear is one of the main advocates picketing for comfort in the rally against change. And man is she a loud one. My favorite is the sign held stating that “All will be lost”. And the creativity of the mind in the loss is commendable. Rejection and uncertainty are comrades in the game and typically where you find one, you will find them both. Yet, they don’t always make themselves known. Of course, you might be entertained by them when the big decisions are at hand. But when the small, seemingly insignificant ones are at play they take their advocacy underground, still pulling at you, yet drawing too much attention. 

This is why we continue to play small, the unwilling and unknowing participants in a game being played by the subconscious mind and the limitations that, while beneficial at one point, are like cement blocks keeping you grounded.

The Benefits of Embracing the Unknown

Think about it. With as much emphasis as we put into security and stability, and our desire to secure it…have you found it yet? I would venture to say, NO. You may be pushing back on this but if 2020 showed us anything…it is that ANYTHING is possible. Therefore it is all just one big unknown. And our fear is that it will suffocate even our biggest, most brilliant ideas that are nudging to be birthed. It’s a sad death but one that we have seen too often. 

Now imagine that you venture into each day with a sense of excitement over the unknown. Like a book without a cover to be explored or an adventure series where you get to create your own ending. Doesn’t that sound like a bit of fun? 

My own personal story is riddled with examples of stepping out for the adventure and discovering a realm of resilience that I had yet to uncover. I also love the story of Shawn Askinosie which was shared with me during an interview for an upcoming podcast. Shawn was a defense lawyer who felt the nudge. He thought there may be something more meaningful for him and he allowed curiosity to guide him deeply into the unknown where he found…chocolate. Then by stepping outside of his comfort zone…and by a lot, he founded Askinosie Chocolate and is now changing the world. Yet when he started…he had no idea where his journey would lead. 

How to Identify When It’s Time to Get Out

I know, I went bold on that statement, because sometimes it is time to get out. And you know what, I think that deep down we always know when there is something, a relationship either business or personal, a career, a mindset, or a pattern that we need to get out of. The nudging is there. It is that piece of you that feels unsettled. You don’t know what it is, it just feels a little snug, frustrating, or downright constricting. The problem is, we have become accustomed to pushing these nudges aside and giving them little to no attention. I mean in the midst of our busy lives, who has time for that, right?

Well, my friend, you must create a little space for that nudge to be heard. It could be as easy as a question when the thought arises. What is the discomfort and where is it coming from? When do you feel it most? Is it ever present? 

The push for more is hardly ever out of selfishness, though our little advocates for comfort will tell us differently. I’ll let you in on a little secret, the push for more is the purest and truest version of you pushing you. It is you, knowing that change is your greatest opportunity for growth and for achieving your deepest desires.

So What’s Your Move? 

How do you get out of your comfort zone? First, identify it. Allow yourself to be aware of the presence of the nudge or itch, that tiny bit of discomfort. Then give it some space. I’m a typical Type A mover so patience hasn’t always been a good friend. Yet I find more and more that if I give just a little bit of space to the thoughts that are coming forward or the questions that I have surrounding the current situation, answers will arise.

Perhaps it is an upcoming conference and an email has just landed in your inbox. While it has nothing to do with your business, you feel like you need to be there but can’t explain why. Or it is a hobby or interest of yours that you’d love to spend more time with but don’t know what you would do with it. (I always find this self-doubting thought to be a hijacker of brilliance and curiosity.)

You might be one who knows exactly what you want to do. That’s amazing! Set the goal and start taking the steps to get there. Just know and remain aware that your advocate for comfort is hanging in the wings. When things start to feel tough, pull her up front and address her directly. Tell her you appreciate her help and desire to keep you safe, but you’ve got this. She can hang and come along for the ride but no longer gets to be in charge of the navigation system.

Embracing the Journey: Cultivating a Mindset of Curiosity

You will hear me say it over and over again. Curiosity is key to everything, including stepping out of your comfort zone. Courage, yes, but that only comes after curiosity has been employed. 

Curiosity is one of those wondrous gifts that we were given as children and over time shifted. It became more about finding the answer or outcome vs. remaining open to opportunity. We must remain open. Holding loosely to the outcome as well as the consequence. Remember all we ultimately have is the unknown. Curiosity provides resilience for navigating through the unknown. By asking questions of the discomfort, and the nudges we have the opportunity to move into an energy of open awareness allowing the energy of the moment to share with us where the edge is.

Your comfort zone, while safe and familiar, is not where growth thrives. Tune into the nudges of discomfort and allow curiosity to lead you into the unknown. Have the courage to make bold moves, engage with the world around you, and step into your greatest potential.

Is there something in your life nudging you towards change? What’s your next move to venture out of your comfort zone? Share your thoughts in the comments, and let’s embark on this journey of self-discovery together. Remember, the magic happens outside your comfort zone. Step out and embrace it.

Knowledge vs. Wisdom: Unlocking the True Power of Innate Insight

Picture this: The roar of the crowd, the sweat and exhilaration of the football field, and suddenly, a heart-stopping moment. My oldest, right there on the pitch, concussed. What followed was nothing short of astonishing.

The Football Field Revelation

How My Son’s Experience Differentiated Knowledge from Wisdom Knowledge and wisdom – two words often used interchangeably, yet so profoundly different. Both revolve around a realm of understanding, but their roots and impacts diverge. Let me paint you a clearer picture.

Last year, I watched in horror as my son suffered a concussion during a football game. It was a nasty one. But my boy, ever the fighter, tapped into a deep reservoir of healing energy right then and there. And just like magic, he not only recovered but also continued the game. The crowd was flabbergasted. We weren’t.

Fast forward a few months, a shoulder injury plagued him. Despite witnessing his astounding recovery earlier, he bore this pain longer than I’d expected. Puzzled, I quizzed him. Why hadn’t he harnessed the same healing prowess? His answer left me ruminating: a friend’s physical therapist father had assessed it would take six months to heal. He added, “Well mom, he has the background. This is what he does. He went to school for this.”

The Bathtub Epiphany

Meditating on Deep-rooted Beliefs The contrast was stark – professional knowledge vs innate wisdom.

Now, I have a ritual. When faced with an enigma, I often retreat to my bathtub, soaking both in water and thoughts. And as I meditated on this, a revelation dawned. We, as a society, tend to heavily lean on acquired knowledge – those fancy certifications, diplomas, and structured education. But what about wisdom, that intangible essence of true knowing that sprouts from within?

Wisdom – The Unsung Hero

Navigating Our Internal Compass Wisdom is an epiphany. It’s that ‘Eureka!’ moment when solutions surface from our innermost depths. Yet, more often than not, we shelve this profound insight, seeking external validation – turning to facts, figures, and testimonials of others.

Knowledge – A Double-edged Sword?

When External Facts Override Inner Truth While knowledge offers a comforting cushion of proven data, wisdom presents an exciting avenue of innovation and creativity. Knowledge, while factual, is tethered to others’ perspectives and conclusions. On the other hand, embracing wisdom allows one to truly harness their potential, viewing a plethora of opportunities unfettered by the confines of established knowledge.

Embracing Our Own Truth

The Power of Personal Wisdom in Shaping Reality My son’s healing journey offered a poignant insight: knowledge, at times, can dim our inner light. When he relied on a predetermined recovery time, it altered his perspective and limited his self-healing potential.

So here’s a parting thought for all you thinkers and dreamers out there: Knowledge, in all its glory, is derived from someone’s spark of wisdom. But isn’t it more fulfilling to discover our own reservoir of wisdom? When you experience that fleeting moment of insight, trust it. Embrace it. After all, why let others shape your reality when you hold the brush to paint your own?